It was a normal night, Christmas Eve, to be exact, and our heroes were celebrating the Holidays right; With a party!
"We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas and an adventure-filled year!" Goldfish Darkskull sang whilst partying. Agent simply rolled his eyes under his recently-obtained glasses. "Gather 'round everyone, and we shall sing a tale of a great man: Santa Claus." Goldfish ordered everyone. They complied and gathered 'round.
"He knows when you are sleeping" Saltine started
"He knows when you're on the can" Tom added
"He'll hunt you down and blast your --" 10 started
"No cussing!" Agent interrupted
" -- REAR from here to Pakistan" 10 finished
"Ohhhh!" Cookie began
"You better not breathe, you better not move" Hunter interrupted
"You're better off dead, I'm telling you, dude" Sasquatch sang
"Santa Claus is gunning you doooooooown!!!" Goldfish finished
"You idiots, that's not how the song goes! That's the Futurama version about the killer psycho robot Santa!" Agent told them "Now, as for the real Santa, his song might go a little something like this. Cue music" The music started. "Lights" The lights dimmed and a spotlight was put on Agent. "And mic" Some guy walked up to Agent. "Not Mike, mic! As in microphone!" Someone threw a small appliance at Agent. "Not a microWAVE, a microPHONE!" Somebody else threw a small phone at him. Agent had had enough. He simply rolled his eyes and walked into the other room. When he walked back in, he was holding a microphone. He pointed to it and everyone said in unison "Ohhhhhhhhh!"
"On Christmas Eve, he packs the sleigh, bringing gifts, by Christmas Day, they say, he is magical, that old fat guy Claus, and it's tiring, for just one night, for he can't just hit pause! His name is Santa, S-A-N-T, add one more A, and you will see, he knows if you've been good, he watches you while you sleep, he's not a stalker, and he's not a creep, he just wants to, give all of you, presents to... celebrate!" Agent sang. Everyone applauded and he bowed
"Wow, dude, that was radtacular! How did you just, know that!? I mean, was it on a show? Who wrote it?" Goldfish asked him
"I did." Agent answered
"Well, when? And how was the music prepared?" Goldfish wondered
"I expected you of all people, and I use that term loosely, to understand how a musical works. We all had rehearsals every Thursday for the past two months. Didn't you get the invitation?" Agent explained
"...no!" Goldfish responded
"......oh, that must have been why I was so happy." Agent burned. Goldfish shrugged and went back to partying, knowing fully who Santa is.
"Police took my car!" a voice entered from the outside, and was soon followed by the body who spoke it: Alexa.
"Police took my car!" her twin Alex repeated.
The rest of the Daisy56 gang entered, and sang, "I ran a red light, and the po-po got me!"
"I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas, from the bottom, of my jail cell!!!" Alexa wailed.
"Ijole! I cannot take this torture!" Daisy complained in a unusually thick Mexican accent.
"I'm sorry for your loss... it's always hard to lose someone on Christmas *sheds single tear*" Goldfish attemted to comfort Alex and Alexa.
Alex responded saying "...my car wasn't alive..."
"Oh, I thought you had one of those Transformers, more than meets the eye!" Goldfish answered, hoping to get a check from whatever company it is that owns Transformers for the advertisement.
Suddenly Smilez came running in like a madwoman. "THE POLICE IS AFTER MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 10 rolled in after her, rolling her eyes and saying "Surprise!" Smilez crashed into a random chair and laid on top of it, screaming "I DIDN'T DO NOTHING!!! I ONLY WANTED CRABS FOR CHRISTMAS!!!" The other 9 DW's flew in, cracking up. Smilez rolled off the chair and onto the floor. "IT AIN'T FUNNY!! I WANTED CRABS FOR CHRISMTAS!! IS THAT REALLY SUCH A MORTAL SIN???"
"Yes, yes it is" 8 replied. "You'll have to wait until May. But if you want, we can pop over to New England and I'll hook you up with some scrod."
"NOOOOOO, NOOOOOOOOOT SCROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDD!!!!!" Smilez screamed/sang.
"May I ask what is a scrob?" Matt asked.
"Ding fries are done! Ding fries are done!" Alex and Alexa began.
"I gotta run! I gotta run! I gotta run!" Daisy and Didi joined in.
"SCROD IS THE FISH OF WEIRDNESS!!!" Smilez screamed.
"More or less, ya" 8 added.
"I want scrod!" Daisy exclaimed in her still-Mexican-accent-thick voice.
"Smilez, what happened?" Jacob asked.
"Well, it happened something like dis..." Smilez replied.
"In a department store north of Houston" Smilez sang. ("And that's in Texas, people!" she interjected) "Sat a Santa Clause on Christmas Eve" A rather tired-looking Santa was sitting on his throne. The room is a mess and all of his "elves" had already gone home for the night. "In a minute he knows, the front door will close, and this tired old Santa can pack up and leave." Suddenly Smilez ran through the door, almost falling flat on her face. "When I appeared to come out of nowhere," she continued singing "and I sat right down on Santa's knee, and the whole place stopped dead," well, it was dead to begin with "And that's when I said 'Dear Santa, I appreciate you listening to me.' Aaand I saaiid 'Oh, I want crabs for Christmas, oh, only crabs will do, oh, for with crabs for Christmas, my Christmas wish'll come true. Well Santa, he started perspirin'" Santa appears to be sweating buckets - literally. "An' it looked like he might be in pain. And his face got all stiff, as he asked me if I would take just a moment and kindly explain. So I said 'Ya know, I'm from Mareland. And them crabs is what I'm wishin' for. Don't ya know, Santa dear, that crabs an' a root beer would be like a trip back to ol' Bawlimore.'" "Baawliimoore" the choir sang. Smilez looked around confusedly, then sang, 'Oh, I want crabs for Christmas, oh, only crabs'll do, oh, for with crabs for Christmas, my Christmas wish'll come true'. Well, 'round the corner came two big policemen," Two big, very meaty policemen came completely out of nowhere. Smilez screamed shrilly. "And they saw me there on Santa's lap. An' they reached for my throat and my homingly (?) coat and they picked me up, losin' my Oriole cap". Past Smilez looked at the cap in astonishment and said "An' I don't even like baseball!" Then the present Smilez continued singing, "But then Santa said 'Put 'er down this instant! Now, my girl, what you want is so odd, but there's no crabs 'til May, so we'll hop on my sleigh, and we'll fly to New England and I'll get you scrod'" Past Smilez's face paled and her eyes widened as she screamed/sang "NOOO, NOOT SCROOD!!!" Then she continued singing "Oh, I want crabs for Christmas, oh, only crabs'll do, oh, for with crabs for Christmas, my Christmas wish'll, my Christmas wish'll, my Christmas wish'll-" A whistle blew out of nowhere. The choir said "What's that?" Past Smilez replied with "Don't ya know? That's my Christmas wish'll!" Then everyone finished the song "My Christmas wish'll come truuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuue!
"And I can't ice skate to save a life, neither!" Smilez announced proudly.
"Somehow, I don't really believe that..." Jacob mumbled, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear, reavealing their pointyness.
"Wait, so Santa makes all the toys? How does he do it? There's a lot of girls and boys, way to many to emit" Goldfish sang
"Well, of course not Goldy, you idiot, he has a bunch of elves, that's who does it." Agent responded through song
"Hey, look at me, I'm catching on, not too bad for a guy who missed the song... rehearsals" Goldfish singfailed."But more importantly, we have to thank, these epic elves, who run his bank."
"FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE GOOOOOOOLDEN RIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!!!!!!!!" Cookie chimed in.
"Cookie, just shut up, wrong song, look it up." Goldfish sang him.
"Well, okay, man, ya don't gotta be mean, I'll go look it up, and wipe my slate clean!" Cookie responded
"Can we stop singing, I'm running out of rhymes, let's just get to thanking the elves, we're losing time!" Agent sang
"But it's a musical, how can we stop? Hold on a moment, time to do the bunny hop!!" Goldfish sang whilst hopping away. Agent merely stopped the music using a small remote located in his jacket pocket. He pulled out some blueprints and showed them to Goldfish. "I hope this meets your expectations for the way we'll thank the elves" He told him
"OH GOD NO MAN THAT IS NOT WHAT I WAS THINKING I AM NOT GONNA DO THAT TO SOME CREEPY ELF!!!!!!!" Goldfish yelled
Agent looked at the blueprints and rolled his eyes, turning the blueprints 90 degrees to the right.
"Oh yeah, that's cool. But not exactly what I was thinking... I was thinking we journey to the pole and thank them in person!" Goldfish explained. <FADE OUT><FADE IN> Our heroes are traveling along through the snow and ice in the blistering cold, trying to reach the pole.
"WE MADE IT!!!!!" Goldfish yelled, looking at a pole sticking out of the ground with snow over the first word with only "Pole" visible.
"Wh-wh-where's the w-w-w-worksh-sh-shop...?" Agent asked, stuttering from the cold. Goldfish looked around then checked his map. He turned it over and said "...this is the South Pole..."
"Rookies..." Imelda muttered and dismaterialized out of there.
"'Ey, where's the Tripelet bros?" Smilez slurred. She had been drinking a lot of hot chocolate.
"Maybe they went in the right direction" Snap mumbled.
"That's highly possible, since Jake is a wizard tracker" Zo glared at Goldfish.
"I'm outta here," Alice spat, flying away. Just then, a crab randomly appeared and walked up to Goldfish. He picked it up and handed it to Smilez. Smiling, he said "Your Christmas wish came true!"
"...there are crabs in Antarctica?" Agent wondered aloud.
"Apparently so." Smilez mumbled, cuddling her new toy. "Aw, he's shoo coot, I can't wait to turn you into cream of crab soup" she cooed. The crab looked scared.
"Don't be soo mean!" Didi complained. Daisy56 and the rest of her followers looked bored as heck. Smilez was too distracted to pay any attention to her. She was drooling and giggling maniacally.
"I knew we shouldn't of given her that much chocolate..." 3 mumbled.
"...well, I think we've been waiting long enough, it's time to go" Goldfish began to sing.
"Well, normally I would but my feet are covered in snow" Agent sang.
"Get me outta here, puh-lease..." Daisy sang.
"Or else she'll check that you'll all don't get potatoes in your cheese..." Daisy56 joined in.
"WHAT??" Snap asked.
"You've never had potatoes in your cheese?" Smilez finally looked up from her new pet.
Snap rolled her eyes, then sang "North Pole is where all the elves live.
And one of them is our good friend Johnn'nn.
D-did that rhyme?" she asked.
Zo rolled her eyes. "I don't think so, but there's not enough time." she sang back. "We have to fly out of here, before the mortals freeze" The camera cuts over to Smilez bouncing off the walls (snow? walls?) Zo stuck her face in front of the camera and broke the fourth wall "Then again, Smilez might heat this place to a hundered degrees" she sang.
"'EY!" Smilez yelled, faceplanting in the snow, where she proceeded to make a snow angel.